Behind

I dread laundry. Put me in a kitchen with an overloaded sink of dishes and I am good to go. With laundry, I would rather shove it in a corner or leave it piled to the ceiling in a basket, as it stares at me and awaits folding. My sweet husband used to say how he never minded doing laundry until I redefined what "doing laundry" actually entailed ... (simply moving it from washer to dryer does not count). Maybe one of the main reasons for my disdain is a gene I inherited from my mom or it could be because I am always behind. My mom has always said that she will know that she did not make it to heaven if she dies and a washing machine awaits her. I have to agree.

Blogging has felt that way for me over the past several months. I have this ridiculous pattern in my life that I really want to change. Before I go any further in this silly confession, please know I am not attempting to beat myself up in an area where I am lacking. I assure you I am just making fun of myself as well as making light of my messy thinking. The pattern is this: Once I get behind on anything, I somehow just let things go until the point of return is dismal. One disclaimer: I am selective on areas where this allowance takes place. Laundry is definitely at the top of the lis, with cataloguing photos coming in at a close second. (I encourage any guilt-ridden, scrapbooking, wannabe mom to feel instantaneously better about herself right about now.) Filing paperwork and keeping up with the accounting for our non-profit are up there as well. I would tell you to keep the latter one on the DL with my husband, but he is well aware.

I thought I could not possibly add another category to the list allowing this pattern to further itself. But, I was wrong. Blogging seems to have found its way into my world of procrastination. I even started building a new blog today thinking I could just start over with a clean slate. I know - ridiculous. I quicly abandoned this idea after realizing the absurdity of now having two blogs in need of updates. This would be like attempting to solve my laundry issue with the purchase of another washing machine and dryer.

So, I finally came to the realization that confessing I get behind on things is much healthier and honest. The truth is, no one really cares as much as I do. It's not like anyone reading this is left with some grandios cliffhanger and can't wait to read the next chapter of my life. Honestly, I just feel better writing it down and want to move on. I want to write when it's fun and not when it's work. I want to write when I feel inspired by the things I love. I would love to be more like my friends who have kept up with every moment of their life through being more consistent bloggers. Really, I would. And I admire them so much for doing so!

While I have a long way to go in letting go of areas that keep me burdened with guilt, I feel better acknowledging these little areas. Besides, they really are small in the grand scheme of things and certainly do not define me. At least I hope not. And in the end, if it's something important, I WILL get around to it eventually. If not, I accept that it probably wasn't that important anyway. Besides, I happen to think laundry folded and put away on a daily basis is WAY overrated.